Yale Quarterback Faces Worst White Boy Dilemma Ever

Posted: November 15, 2011 in Ramblings
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Yale University quarterback Patrick Witt is"every inch the football hero," "a contender for the NFL draft," "the most accurate passer in Yale history." He is also very smart, with a 3.91 GPA and a shot at the Rhodes Scholarship.

And he is troubled.

For a terrible tragedy has befallen our statuesque hero of hard-bodied perfection: His Rhodes interview is on the same day as the Yale-Harvard football game.

Has ever a white boy suffered so much? Will Patrick Witt lead his team to victory, in the final game of his college career and most critical moment in a centuries-old rivalry between rich people? Or will he return to his hometown of Atlanta, to dazzle a panel of regional Rhodes judges, as is required to qualify for the most elite fellowship program in the English-speaking world?

Or will he quit everything, and run off to marry a female blogger who spends a significant portion of her life in sweatpants? Wait, Patrick, don’t go. I can change. [The Daily Nightly,@Yale@michelleruiz]

He chose ‘The Game’ over the Rhodes. I am shocked.

I think it’s a bit dumb to play in a game where Harvard is already crowned the Ivy Champs, your team hasn’t won against Harvard in 4 years and you haven’t yet been considered for the NFL…So you chose to defer the chance for a prestigious award for a football game that functions as a chance for rich, educated elites to gather around and hob nob (or equally pretentious, upwardly mobile young alumni get wastey face)? Um, OK.

But considering that he was a transfer from Nebraska, a significantly more sporty school, I get it. Also, that puts my heart at ease to know that "[He] DOESN"T EVEN GO HERE!!" or that as a transfer student his ‘Yale-ness’ is actually lesser than if he had been there all four years. I know that this sounds pretentious, but you don’t bust your ass for years to go to a top school, retain a stellar 3.91 GPA and decide to put athletics first…not in this kind of scenario. I bet in high school, he didn’t not do his homework because of a football game. Well, maybe he did. I don’t know, but I guess I really do find this hard to comprehend.

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